But first. During the past few weeks, I have felt isolated, alienated, confused, and simply just burnt out. All of that has lead to me saying some harsh and angry things, of which I apologize for how they came out but not the subtle message I failed at getting across. Those attributes are in no way an excuse but rather an explanation of how my emotions have led me to say some things. I'm extremely hot headed and because of that, I tend to get really emotional, say a bunch of things, and deal with the consequences at a later date when I realize better ways to say what I meant. Basically, I'm impulsive and tend to speak before I think. For the most part, I'm apologizing for how what I have said has come across but not so much for the content of what I have said.
Regardless, time for marriage equality.
Today I woke up to the news of the SCOTUS rulings on DOMA and Prop 8 and rather than feeling really anything, I just felt numb. Not numb in the sense that I'm upset at the way the courts ruled because really, it's actually really exciting to see SCOTUS rule in such a progressive way. (Is progressive the right word? I don't really like that word there but I can't think of another way to explain it)
I felt (and still do feel) numb because honestly, after years of being an activist, I've hit this point in my life where I'm just exhausted. I really don't have the words for it other than the fact that I'm just really tired of feeling like I'm constantly on the go and constantly on a rollercoaster of emotions. So I feel numb not because of I don't like decisions but rather because I've run out of steam.
My biggest issue (really the only significant one regarding it) about marriage equality is never because I want to deny equality but rather the immense amount of money and resources and time devoted to this single issue. It just bugs me that the fight for rights and acceptance is so simplified to the sexy issue of marriage equality. Being able to get married is going to bring benefits to couples where it's legal that weren't there before but at the same time, that isn't going to solve issues.
As far as I know and maybe there's some weird ruling that completely changes this but:
- If I understand things correctly, there are no legal protections as far as employment in 29 states for sexual orientation and 33 states for gender identity. (Source)
- A large proportion of homeless youth identify as queer in any regard, despite being a small percentage of the general population. (Source) (This source actually has some other stats about queer homeless youth as well)
- The intersectionality of race, gender, sexual orientation, documentation status, class, etc. Simply taking one aspect of a person isn't going to fix all of the problems that society faces and not looking at the intersectionality of characteristics is not good.
- I really need to look into this more but a simple Google search found a newspaper article about how queer people of color might actually experience more violence. (Source)
- (The sources here are just really from a quick Google search and are in no way completely and totally reliable. I'll be getting more sources during the next few months and in all likelihood, I'll probably post summaries and links of what I find.)
This is just the beginning. Right now I'm starting to write a paper in regards to a very similar topic of this post and I'll continuously post what I find when I come across the issues.
But in the end, I do have issues involving simply the institution of marriage (regardless of gender) but if someone wants to get married, I will never stand in their way of doing such. (I'm a firm believer in the fact that it's not my life, thus my opinion shouldn't stop people.)
Ultimately I just wish there was a way we could manage to find a way to juggle all of the balls involving issues and rights. I'm burnt out with trying to fight the same fight for just one part of the big picture and I feel like society is just losing sight of the forest by looking at just one tree.
Marriage equality, while great for those who have been together for a long time and are married in some regard or look forward to marriage, isn't going to solve all of the issues and the overemphasis placed of the sexiness of marriage is what truly frustrates me the most.
